happy shnappy

i have just been killin' myself lately with pure tom foolery. i am crackin up all over the place, but in a good way. just about everyone is on my last nerve and i could go christmas postal, but, i'm finding the humor in the insanity. did i mention i was reprimanded by a woman at walmart yesterday? she said i cut her in line. i showed so much restraint in my response because the absurdity of it all was just, well....absurd. listen, if she had had a kidney on ice (we were in the 'express lane') i would have just felt awful and would have even offered up my rotten liver for being so insensitive not to notice that her products were already on the counter when i moved forward as the other cashier said 'i'll help who's next'. the best part was she looked like a complete ass. and for once it wasn't me.  people around us were just staring at her like a spoiled brat. i wish i had yelled 'STOP THE PRESSES, WOMAN MAKES HONEST MISTAKE'...but i didn't think of it until i was on my way to my swagger wagon. i sure hope these synopsis in my brain start sparkin' sooner cause i could have a stand up comedy routine ready to try out at the famous Twin Rivers Casino.  until then, i'll enjoy being sober and the fact that i'm not the christmas ass this year. yay for me!  see, christmas ass....now that's genius....get it...the wise men road on ass' to give gifts of stuff to the little lord 7 lb 8oz baby jesus....